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knew_anyway[The video flicks on again, showing Nathaniel in profile- his head is tipped down, as he mulls over a cup of tea.]
I've been watching the network lately, and it seems that there is a certain amount of mistrust aimed toward the people trying to organize this whole- police force idea. And why wouldn't there be? I, for example, have only been in this city for a few weeks. There's no reason for anyone to believe anything I say, or to trust me with any sort of power.
So I thought I would- tell you about me. I know this may not help all of you, but for some... perhaps this can help you to see that I'm trying to approach this with only thoughts of the people.
[He takes a deep breath. This story isn't exactly an easy one for him to tell- it's one that he'd only just realized the ending of shortly before his untimely arrival into Adstringendum.]
I entered in my service the government in my home world when I was thirteen. This government, it was... twisted. [He stirs his tea with a sigh.] -and I came to realize that. And I thought, if I rose enough, I could change it from the inside. What I didn't see was how the people around me were changing me.
[Another long pause.] Power corrupts. Ambition, greed- these things lead to the kind of police force that you all are wary of. I, myself, have battled all three of these in my four years serving the British government. I know how easily they can twist a well-meaning person into a self-serving dictator- I witnessed this very transition within people who I thought were my allies. I found myself in the prime minister's cabinet, only to watch the entire thing topple like a deck of cards, as the magicians succumbed to their greed. To their own ambition. [His hands tighten on the cup now.] The reign turned hostile and demanding toward the commoners, and a small group of them revolted against us. The magicians, struggling for power amongst themselves, were in no position to lead a unified front. Though their lust for power, a potent demon was summoned, and the entire governing force fell in a single day.
[He sets the cup down then, facing the camera, but looking off toward the distance. When Nathaniel said the entire governing force, he meant all of them. Every member of the cabinet, including himself, had died that day.]
In the end, I fought against them- the people who I had served, I could serve no longer. I saw the truth, in that day- and I vowed to spend every breath I had, making my world one where the government was fair and just. I believe that vow also extends to you. This place is my home now, you are my people. It is my only wish to help and protect this city, to allow it to grow to its full potential in a way that is befitting to every single person here, not just a select few.
[Finally, Nathaniel's eyes meet the screen.]
I believe that my experience with the tainted government can help to prevent the same thing from happening here. It is my fullest intent to protect you- all of you. Not only from the monsters that lie in wait, or the criminals who can hurt and kill... but from those charged with your protection as well.
[He nods his head once.] Thank you.
[If only Kitty were here, she'd be able to say this better. With heart and passion, rather than calm, pained words. Nathaniel takes a deep breath and tries to think of something else- anything else he could say. But before he can speak again, the feed times out.]
I've been watching the network lately, and it seems that there is a certain amount of mistrust aimed toward the people trying to organize this whole- police force idea. And why wouldn't there be? I, for example, have only been in this city for a few weeks. There's no reason for anyone to believe anything I say, or to trust me with any sort of power.
So I thought I would- tell you about me. I know this may not help all of you, but for some... perhaps this can help you to see that I'm trying to approach this with only thoughts of the people.
[He takes a deep breath. This story isn't exactly an easy one for him to tell- it's one that he'd only just realized the ending of shortly before his untimely arrival into Adstringendum.]
I entered in my service the government in my home world when I was thirteen. This government, it was... twisted. [He stirs his tea with a sigh.] -and I came to realize that. And I thought, if I rose enough, I could change it from the inside. What I didn't see was how the people around me were changing me.
[Another long pause.] Power corrupts. Ambition, greed- these things lead to the kind of police force that you all are wary of. I, myself, have battled all three of these in my four years serving the British government. I know how easily they can twist a well-meaning person into a self-serving dictator- I witnessed this very transition within people who I thought were my allies. I found myself in the prime minister's cabinet, only to watch the entire thing topple like a deck of cards, as the magicians succumbed to their greed. To their own ambition. [His hands tighten on the cup now.] The reign turned hostile and demanding toward the commoners, and a small group of them revolted against us. The magicians, struggling for power amongst themselves, were in no position to lead a unified front. Though their lust for power, a potent demon was summoned, and the entire governing force fell in a single day.
[He sets the cup down then, facing the camera, but looking off toward the distance. When Nathaniel said the entire governing force, he meant all of them. Every member of the cabinet, including himself, had died that day.]
In the end, I fought against them- the people who I had served, I could serve no longer. I saw the truth, in that day- and I vowed to spend every breath I had, making my world one where the government was fair and just. I believe that vow also extends to you. This place is my home now, you are my people. It is my only wish to help and protect this city, to allow it to grow to its full potential in a way that is befitting to every single person here, not just a select few.
[Finally, Nathaniel's eyes meet the screen.]
I believe that my experience with the tainted government can help to prevent the same thing from happening here. It is my fullest intent to protect you- all of you. Not only from the monsters that lie in wait, or the criminals who can hurt and kill... but from those charged with your protection as well.
[He nods his head once.] Thank you.
[If only Kitty were here, she'd be able to say this better. With heart and passion, rather than calm, pained words. Nathaniel takes a deep breath and tries to think of something else- anything else he could say. But before he can speak again, the feed times out.]
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Date: 2011-09-27 04:00 pm (UTC)[His smile looks a bit forced and she's about to ask if he'd rather she came back another time when he speaks. He made tea. So it'd probably be rude of her to leave now.]
Tea would be nice. [She steps in.]
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Date: 2011-09-27 04:02 pm (UTC)[He moves off to get it then, pouring two cups before returning to the sitting room.]
Thank you for stopping by.
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Date: 2011-09-27 04:10 pm (UTC)[Again she just nods. So much for social niceties with Raven.] This place's quite big. Are you living here alone?
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Date: 2011-09-27 04:18 pm (UTC)[He settles down in the chair next to her.]
I enjoy the space, and the privacy it provides. I'd leave if it were requested of me, but for now, it suits my purposes.
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Date: 2011-09-27 04:33 pm (UTC)Now I don't see why anyone would request that of you.
So... you're settling well, then?
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Date: 2011-09-29 07:53 pm (UTC)[It's... not the best tea. But it's not the worst, either.]
It's difficult- I've never had to do all of the housework before.
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Date: 2011-09-29 08:03 pm (UTC)Offline
Date: 2011-09-30 10:43 pm (UTC)[He glances toward his cup.]
I'm only seventeen. Until three years ago, I was living with an appointed guardian. After that, I had other people to do my housework.
[Servants, he means.]
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Date: 2011-10-03 04:58 pm (UTC)Offline
Date: 2011-10-03 08:37 pm (UTC)[He glances toward his tea, a little uncomfortably.]
My first master was murdered when I was twelve. My second abandoned me when I was fourteen. At that point though, I was high enough in the government to support myself, and I've lived on my own ever since.
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Date: 2011-10-09 07:28 pm (UTC)Offline
Date: 2011-10-10 03:28 am (UTC)[He winces.]
-not exactly, no.
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Date: 2011-10-10 07:05 am (UTC)Offline
Date: 2011-10-10 07:10 am (UTC)[He manages a wry smile.]
Kitty and I weren't friends. We were actually on opposite sides of a growing civil war- and we were each other's prime targets. [A little pause, as he tries to figure out how to phrase this.] ...when the government collapsed, I realized I was wrong all along. She helped me fix the magician's fatal error- we worked together in those final hours to achieve something that had never before been seen in my world.
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Date: 2011-10-10 07:18 am (UTC)This achievement you speak of, does it have anything to do with the [Just a slight pause as she remembers what he had said.] 'Glass Tower'?
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Date: 2011-10-10 07:28 am (UTC)[That catches him off-guard. Nathaniel tries to remember when he'd told her that, before remembering the rushed blur when he arrived. Slowly, he nods, setting his tea down and clasping his hands together.]
-there was a monster that the magicians had let loose, thinking that they could control it. It ravaged London, forced the magicians to summon more demo- spirits, making an army for itself. [He starts talking to the wall, soft, detached, practically ignoring her entirely.] Kitty convinced a spirit to join me and fight them of its own free will. In the end... [Nathaniel takes a deep breath.] -In the end, the only way to stop the leader was to use a powerful staff and bring down a building of glass and iron on top of us both. I was wounded by then. I knew it was my only chance, and I knew I wouldn't make it out alive. I promised Kitty that I would catch up with her, that I would find her. And then I-
[A quiet pause, letting that soak in.]
I arrived to Adstringendum post-mortem. [It sounds so official like that, delicate, concise. He hasn't told anyone yet- not Rei, not Tom, not even Jean Louis. It seemed so much more real, now that the words were out of his mouth. Nathaniel was dead. He had the emptiness of death waiting for him, should the Animus ever send him back.
It wasn't a comforting thought.]
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Date: 2011-10-10 08:19 am (UTC)[There is a longer pause before Raven finally speaks again.] Death awaits me back home too. Not immediately upon my return but soon after that. [And she sips her tea just as if she'd just said something casual.]
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Date: 2011-10-10 08:24 am (UTC)[He doesn't like the idea of her dying. He doesn't like the idea of dying in general. Nathaniel swallows hard.]
...I wasn't afraid. I didn't have time to be afraid, really. I just had to act. But now... being here, agonizing about it- it's not a good feeling, knowing that I go back to nothing.
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Date: 2011-10-10 08:36 am (UTC)You died saving your world, there's nothing to regret about that. And even if death is never a good perspective, I'd like to be able to say the same. [To have the same comfort.] But when I die, I know my world will not be saved. Quite the opposite. And that I won't be the only one to die either. [Raven bows her head slightly, there's something defeated about her posture that contrasts strangely with her usually determined and emotionless attitude. She forces a small smirked upon her lips.] Also I'd like to tell you that the time you're given here is kind of a reward of sorts. But even I am not that sarcastic.
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Date: 2011-10-10 07:59 pm (UTC)[Looking down into his tea.]
It gives me a lot of work to do- keeping myself busy. I wouldn't know what to do with myself if I didn't have that. And I'm pleased that I have the opportunity to meet you all. As for- yourself...
[A pause.]
It's ultimately preferably not to die. Nobody wants to. But... if there is no other option- and you know this for a fact- then at least you have time to accept and prepare for it.
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Date: 2011-10-11 11:14 am (UTC)[She tenses and her look turns a bit harder though she's not looking at him.]
Why should I accept it?
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Date: 2011-10-11 06:42 pm (UTC)[He shrugs.]
But you seem to think that there's no way around it. If that's truly the case, the best thing to do, for your peace of mind, would be to just... accept that it's going to happen, and do the best you can until then.
[Please Nat, take your own advice.]
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Date: 2011-10-11 07:48 pm (UTC)Offline
Date: 2011-10-12 07:29 pm (UTC)[He shakes his head quietly.]</small. I'm afraid I don't understand your circumstances well enough to give proper advice. Forgive me.
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Date: 2011-10-16 03:47 pm (UTC)So... shall we play chess?